1. When I say I love you, I mean that I feel a deep, tender, ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude toward you. I feel a sense of underlying oneness with you that fills my heart with joy.
2. I give my love to you freely, as an expression of my own passion, and I do so without any expectation of your feelings toward me.
3. When I say “I love you” it doesn’t mean that I feel ownership over you, or that I have expectations for your behavior, or rigid ideas of our future together.
4. I love you for what you are now, not for what I hope you will someday become. I have no plans to change you. I do, however, support your own desire to grow.
5. I respect your right to you having your own feelings, and to your need to learn your own lessons in life. If I can help, I will wait to be asked, and otherwise will allow you to go through the experiences that you need and choose.
6. I will do my best to be in touch with my own feelings and desires, and communicate them to you without any expectation that you will act on them.
7. I am happy with or without you. My bliss is my responsibility alone.
8. I leave you free to be yourself: to think your thoughts, indulge your tastes, follow your inclinations, behave in ways that you decide are to your liking. I have no right to judge or change your behavior.
9. I desire that you be happy. If your time spent with me is not joyful, then you are welcome to go on your way with my love and support still with you.
10. I recognize that we are two separate whole people, who have chosen to walk side-by-side through life for a time. I rejoice in the ecstasy of the present-moments we share together.
the ten principles of love